Transitioning from Peer to Manager

One of the most challenging aspects of being promoted internally as a new manager is the change in relationships with your former peers, especially those who are friends.  This new dynamic can take a lot of getting used to and take a while to settle down.  In light of these challenges here are some tips to help you manage these challenges so you can enjoy your new role and your hard-earned promotion.

Acknowledge the change

Often new managers try to hold onto things as they were before the transition.  This is unhelpful to you and your team.  It is better to acknowledge that things are going to change and you as the manager. and your team need to accept this.  You will now be acting in a more formal capacity as part of the management team and will need to distance yourself from some of the conversations, behaviours and events that previously you would have been part of.

Talk to your team

The sooner you can talk to your team about the change the better, ideally before you take up your new position.  It is good to meet with them on an individual basis and as a group.  These meetings are a great opportunity to seek to understand how your team are feeling about the change and to share how you plan to work with them.  By having these meetings, you will also be signposting the change in dynamic between you and them and it will help establish your authority.

Establish boundaries

In your new position you will need to change some of your behaviours, especially towards your friends.  No longer should you try to side with your friends over complaints or issues they may have with management or with the business in general.  You need to listen and try to help them find solutions where you can but not to the extent that this positions you against management. Nor should you overlook any performance issues with friends.  

As a representative of management your behaviour at socials may need to be moderated if previously you tended to be the person who ended up dancing on the tables at the end of the evening.  You may need to leave such occasions earlier than you normally would.  If you start to feel a bit left out then that is to be expected.

Be objective and empathetic

Your behaviour will be being watched to see if you treat your friends more favourably than others; this is to be avoided. Nor should you treat your friends any less favourably in an attempt to demonstrate your even-handedness.  You can stay friends with them but the nature of your work relationship needs to change and they need to come to terms with this. Likewise, those who aren’t your friends or those who you do not get on with will be watching to see that they are treated fairly.

Your direct reports may well now include those who were competing for the same promotion as you but were unsuccessful.  Be empathetic; they may need time to re-adjust to what has happened. Be open with them and show that they are a valued team member and you will be supporting their ongoing development.

For those direct reports who were peers that you did not like or get on with, do not avoid addressing this.  Acknowledge the previous relationship and set expectations for the future dynamic.

For those direct reports that may be older and more experienced than you, treat them with empathy and respect and seek to leverage their knowledge and experience for the benefit of the team and yourself.  For some it may be a challenge being managed by someone younger and less experienced.

You need to treat all your team members objectively and constructively, providing them with the rewards and criticism they deserve. You should be focusing on their performance and behaviour, not on what you feel about them as a person.

Small changes at first

There is a temptation as a new manager to want to make your mark with some early and significant changes or interventions.  Whilst this is understandable it is often better to avoid any major overhauls initially and focus on some small changes that you can achieve quickly and successfully. Getting input from your team about these initial changes will also help as this demonstrates your desire to be collaborative and consultative.  You will need to establish your trust and gain their respect before making any more fundamental changes.

Make use of your advantages

Compared to managers that are appointed from outside your firm, you have several advantages. You will know the people, protocols and politics of the business better than an outsider.  You will know what’s working and what isn’t.  Make use of this as you plan your approach to any changes; champion those issues that you and your team know need changing.

Likewise, you will know who you can trust to give you open and honest feedback which is so valuable in the early stages of your new role. Make use of those relationships to help you understand how you are doing and where you might need to change your approach.

Establish your credibility

Your credibility as a manager will be established by leveraging the competence and confidence in the knowledge, skills and behaviours that got you this promotion in the first place.  Use these to help your team develop and achieve their goals. Do not let this promotion go to your head and encourage you to start behaving in a way that could be interpreted as being aloof or arrogant.

Develop your skills and resilience

You will also need to develop your management skills in this new role.  Seek out opportunities to achieve this through training events, coaching and mentoring.  You will make mistakes that you will need to admit openly and commit to learn from.  You will also need to develop your resilience to deal with setbacks and to keep going in the face of the demands that are placed upon you in this new role.

Invest time with your new peer group and line manager

You will also need to develop your relationships and credibility with your new peer group of managers and possibly a new line manager. Take time to meet your new peers individually and seek their guidance and support but acknowledge they will also be busy fulfilling their responsibilities. Consider whether any of your new peers could act as your mentor.  Establish how you and your new line manager can best work together; look to set up regular meetings with them, especially in the early stages of your new role and seek their feedback.

At 3Qhub we provide coaching and training to help new managers make a successful transition into their new role.

Our spring conference ‘Building Your Resilience’ on 17 March 2023 will also provide new managers with an excellent opportunity to develop their resilience to cope with the demands that will be placed upon them and deal with the setbacks that they will encounter.  It will also give them the opportunity to network with other managers and learn from their respective experiences.

If you would like to discuss how we can support your business and your new managers, please get in touch.

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